I don't know how to delicately step into this....The lastest bit of Donald Trump has hit me hard in the gut...And I'll tell you why. Unless you have experienced the full truth of the thoughts and actions of a misogynistic, true narcissist who objectifies, defiles and disrespects women and in the process destroys everything that resembles love and respect, you cannot know the stomach turning, gut wrench reaction that the Trump recording brings to a girl like me. I have had a physical deeply emotional reaction that I cannot ignore.
I know this kind of man. Who says it's funny, calls it locker room talk or thinks it is something all men do....The kind of man who truly believes every woman's purpose is to be there for his own needs and wishes. Who doesn't provide a safe place, protection or consideration to the people he claims to love. Who truly thinks that it's okay to force kisses or grab a woman in the most personal of places. Who thinks that it's all another joke and that we should all lighten up. Who apologizes by saying it was years ago (get over it ...) and justifies their heinous words by saying that someone else has said and done worse. Who doesn't really feel badly about it but is trying to get us to move on and once again accept the horrific and despicable nature of his true self without questioning his character. I know this kind of man and once their true self is seen and heard.. that.cannot be unseen or unheard. We cannot unknow. It is despicable and horrifying.
I know this kind of man and I promise you, under the thin façade that he still has, there is worse lurking...And for me...it's not okay. It's not okay to force anything on anyone that doesn't want that thing. It's not okay to make jokes or belittle anyone for on the basis of sex, race, age, looks, religion or anything else. It's not okay, none of this is okay and as horrified as I am by the words coming from a candidate for the Presidency, I'm terrified by the silence or saying the other is worse for other reasons. Maybe we speak for humanity when we don't allow a victimizer to think we are afraid. Maybe just maybe we speak now and love each other harder. Maybe just maybe we fix all this with asking for more of ourselves and each other but especially from the people who we trust to lead. Maybe we don't allow it to continue, don't justify or defend. Maybe we demand better.... Monstrous behavior speaks it's own unacceptable truth.
My loved ones have been terrified and worried about me for years because of such thinking and actions...... and I love them for their fear even when I was hiding in denial....It is hard to understand why anyone would allow such despicable behavior and words into their lives. It's hard to tell you why and how paralyzing this all can be. I have that same fear and worry about our country. From my place of experience it's imperative that we don't explain it away, blame the other party, other people or politics. It's not about politics, it's about being a decent person.... it's about doing what is right, and demanding that our leaders ACT RIGHT and that we act right. It's about expecting more and holding people to a standard of behavior and thought that at the very base doesn't allow for the victimizing or objectifying of anyone. Period. It's about speaking up and letting our humanity be louder than our anger and frustration. It's about showing our daughters and sons that this is not okay....It's just not.
I cannot and will not judge anyone for their politics and don't even ask my friends or loved ones who they plan to vote for. This post is not about that....I hope you understand that. I hope that you do not rain down on me with hard words, I don't think that you will... I've never been so afraid to hit the post button in my life but I am even more afraid to not hit the button.... I'm shaking but feel strongly that this is worth taking the chance that comes with speaking out....