Wednesday, March 30, 2016

Do What You Love......

It's spring and time to lighten up a little/completely.  I've thought and over thought my inside story but there is so much more to me than all of that.  When asked what I do, I say "I make things..."   because that is the truth of it.  I love to make. I love the term MAKER.....It sounds so much fancier than "I make things".  Goodness it sounds like a real job and to me that is what the making is all about.... to be able to create the business and life I desire, with my own hands.  Made by me....

I have been a little bit in hibernation this winter.  I felt badly about it  but, sometimes it's just what you have to do to reset...... I may have wallowed and wondered for a short bit but what else I did was  read Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert and it was the perfect antidote to my hinbernationess.   It also prompted me to figure and put into writing, the core values of my maker's world and my Wildflower 57 business and this is what I came up with..mostly, I don't ever want anything else....and these are my driving core beliefs that I will use to guide me going forward.....

1.  Figure out what you and your business are about.  Be Clear about that.   And then you can do whatever you want with it, change your designs , change the things you make, change your approach and marketing. Any of it. But Know what you are about.....My business is based on the love of faded, colorful, softly made things that remind me of Prairies, Farms,Mountains, Open Spaces, sweet florals, torn whites, bits, pieces  and the freedom to be who I am...Tattered and Tangled..Unfettered....Everything comes from those things....

2.  Stay in your lane......Don't worry about what ANYONE else is doing....there will be many people who make stuff that is similar to yours, or something you had ready to try.   As long as you know what you are about, you know you aren't copying.  NOW...don't take this to mean you can copy a name, steal a picture, encroach on trademarked designs....what that means to me is to not always worry about trying to beat out or out do anyone else who may be close to your style or vision (believe me, this happens and it's not always intentional, sometimes it is ..and that is a different story when trademarks and copyrights are exploited )..  But if you keep your eyes forward, stay in your lane and focus on your intentions and keep rule #1 in your heart....You will be okay.  

3. Support each other.  Don't get caught up in the stuff that will undo you.  This comes from ..big sigh here.... experience.   I've been a participant/ guilty of reacting to what feels like someone trying to steal my ideas and projects. I've been accused of stealing other people's ideas and projects. I've been reactive and possesive . I've been used and hurt.    I know I haven't ever intentionally stepped on someone's toes and the ones I thought stepped on mine....they probably all felt the same.... but truly when you go down that road with another business person, you undo friendships, support systems and destroy good things. Why entertain this and give it any of your energy or try to have the discussion which is never ever going to end well.  Truly, with Pinterest and all the millions of ideas and tutorials out there, we are all bound to step into the circle drawn by someone and they will step into our circle.  And's just that we are doing what we do, following our creative energies where they will take us.... Instead of creating resentment and horrible negativity by thinking and saying that we are the only ones, maybe we just lift each other up. I've been on both sides of this, it feels horrible and embarrassing.  Let's lift each other up and cheer a little bit for everyone, I hope we all make it...  Back to #1 and #2 

4.  Love and Persistence..... This is it..  Design...Make...Repeat.....  and remember why you chose this maker's life. Because you have the heart and soul that doesn't understand any other way to be in the world. Because it's all that you want.  Because it's who you are.   And mostly... because you love it.  The love will see you through the hard work, and make no mistake it's hard work. One dropcloth apron is fun, dropcloth apron #357....not as much...Someday you may get help in the manufacturing of your work which will free you up to create more ideas and designs but it's all going to be work and from my perspective, the best work ever.  But please make sure you are all in....because it will test you but  give you back more than you can dream of......

Lastly....where ever you may be in your creative business world....MAKE A PLAN.  Know where you want to go, have a road to get there, write down the steps you need to take and pursue the goals every single day with all your heart. .  Twists and Turns...take which ever of those  feels right to you. TRUST your vision, TRUST the makers energy and the pull of what calls your name...TRUST yourself....And don't be afraid to leap when leaping is called for.   There will be dry times, there will be busy times when you are exhausted and wonder what you were thinking and there will be times for hibernating and refreshing your tired soul.  But always always always DO WHAT YOU LOVE.......

Long may you make and thrive... 


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Thursday, March 24, 2016

Don't get lost in your feels...

I struggle at times with feeling sad....I do. I fall into a rabbit hole that drops me from doing okay to not so much in a short time.  I'm emotional and I'm not good at  hiding it.  So there.  I've made a serious serious decision to fight this deep rabbit hole at every turn to be happy and live happy.  But sometimes I fail at that because what sends me tumbling down there, is feeling unloved and forgotten. I realize this is my own doing, yes I do. .   For how many years have we heard "you have to love yourself before anyone else can love you"  I mean really... when you suck at feeling loved, how on earth can you love yourself so that you are able to accept and give love.  That statement has  baffled me... for many years/FOR ALL MY LIFE!!!!  Seriously. I didn't get it.  

 And then I read this......  

"It was my life-like all lives, mysterious and irrevocable and sacred.  So very close, so very present, so very belonging to me.  How wild it was, to let it be"
Cheryl Strayed~ Wild~

Let me tell you, I had to stop and read that over and over and over, about 10 overs and it was a light bulb moment.   My life is sacred and belongs to me. Let it be......  Even as I type these words, I am in tears because this is the deal.  If my life is sacred, if I was made this way, wired like this with love and raw emotion...  Who am I not to love that, to love myself.  Why wouldn't I give to me what I want to give to the world and what I want back.   LIFE CHANGING stuff at least for my messy heart.   If I am sacred, so is everyone else.  We are all worthy of love....from ourselves first.   Okay...I need to breathe after that...take in what that feels like to write it down, say it out loud and believe it deep in my soul....

I love deep talks with my sons, I love their perspective and their truths.  I love their wisdom, trust me, the wise words that come from teenagers will break you wide open.  I was rolling around in some less than happy emotions this morning, a little lonely and on the verge of tears... and my oldest said to me.  "Mom, don't get lost in your feels, do something that makes you laugh and lighten up a bit. Trust the world and trust yourself."  This from a kid who has been let down, stumbled and struggled more than anyone I know... I do get lost in my feels ( I love that name for my over thinking emotions) I think it's easy to do, one thing leads to another and there you are, heading for that place that won't serve you at all.  Maybe if we walk away from our social media for a bit, go outside, face to the sun.  Or have lunch with a friend, exercise your heart out, call someone you love and have a chat..MAKE SOMETHING.  Maybe if we just don't get lost in our feels so very much, it will all seem a little less hard. Maybe if we throw that love around a bit more and open up our windows a bit wider, maybe that is how we stay out of the rabbit holes.  Maybe we just trust that we are not alone in all of this...maybe that's it.  Our sacred lives connected to other sacred lives....Well isn't that the magic?

~Glennon Doyle Melton~

Don't get lost in your feels, love your sacred life and let it be, belong to each other.   I think that is some good love to throw around.  Especially on a Thursday..  Let's do it again soon! 

Love you like wildflowers

Wednesday, March 16, 2016

Too Muchness

You are too emotional
You are too loud
You cry too much
You talk too much
You react too quickly
You get too sad
Get over it
You need to stop doing that
Why can't you be like everyone else
You share too much
You say too many things

and this....

YOU ARE JUST TOO MUCH (translated means... I cannot deal with you, stop being you)......

These are the things I have heard about myself for a whole bunch of my life.    Someone I love dearly once told me I was just too much and they were not sure they could take much of me.  I don't honestly know what to do with that...   But being too much...I can't help it. I can't help any of it.  I've always known I was too much, even as a younger girl, I knew it.  And I knew it was hard for people to understand.  It always felt like approval,  acceptance and even love aren't easy  for girls like me.    It's hard  when people think you are just too too too.....   

"You used to be much more.... muchier.....
You've lost your muchness"
~Alice in Wonderland

TOO  much muchness???   I've spent some time /all my life trying to understand how that could possibly be.  How can anyone be too much?     I think we should let our exuberance and too much out ALL THE TIME....I think we should share, talk, breathe, cry, feel, hug, dance , create and LOVE.....way MUCH more than not and please for goodness sake don't stop doing that thing , whatever it is that makes you so wonderfully muchy.... Stop trying to fit inside something you were never meant to fit into at all. It wasn't for you. And please, this is so important....don't chase anyone who cannot or will not love you just the way you are.  Chase your dreams; chase your truth; chase your happiness.... .but do not chase any person who isn't ready for your too much spirit or any person who doesn't want it.  They are not for you and you are not for them......  

The world needs your muchness and it needs mine.  The world needs us to push against the sides of the box we hide in until it breaks open and there we are in all our much too much glory.  Let the ones who cannot deal, well... let them be.  They have their own stuff to handle, just let your crazy brightness out and let it stay there.  Be so much even if nobody gets it.   That's got to be the real thing of it all.  Be so much... REGARDLESS.  Let muchness be your superpower.  Don't believe those who say that you are just too....

I promise that people, the right people will love you more for it.  I will love you more for it, because I too am too much.....just exactly what I was made to be.  Muchness....Please don't ever stop throwing that around. Bring your magical abundance out to the light, bring it everywhere you go.  LIVE LIKE THAT..... please, I need you in this with me. 

Here is my truth and I've been up for many nights with all of this...I've debated and campaigned for and against myself.  I almost stopped writing this blog, there have been some big gaps because I almost stopped doing many of  things I love so much including this.  Writing, Creating, Connecting....because I felt like maybe my too much was just not working and I needed to repack myself into a box; that maybe the world would take me a little more gently if I wasn't so me ....  Until on a train this weekend I remembered....My muchness, it's a gift, a good thing and I love it. I love how very  much I am and I have no intention or desire to fit into anything at all.... I just can't..... I shouldn't have to.....So I won't.   I'm not going to stop writing, I'm not going to stop talking, I won't stop sharing and I will not stop loving  in my too much way. I will make and create because that is my calling.   I will just be this much, too much and I will be way too much until I'm not.  And that is how it's supposed to be.   Unfettered........ and OH SO VERY much too much muchness.  

 I love you....Much..

p.s. when I ran spellcheck on this, the only word that it wanted me to change was guessed it   MUCHNESS...... Underline away spellcheck, muchness is here to stay.